Faith on the Farm (and how mine’s different)

 

I grew up singing a song in primary at church on Sundays that begins, “Faith is like a little seed, if planted it will grow.” Whenever I begin a project, garden or not, this little tune sings in my mind. I have to take the first step and carry on in faith. Plant the seed, get the chicks, build the barn……..

Faith on the farm goes in a different direction for me personally. Let me tell you a short story……we had been out of town for a few days and once home, we got back into the routine. After having come in from chores the first morning back, hubby and I were feeding kiddos, when Jas looks out the window and sees our pup, Hank, burying something white on the side of our garden, After a second to process what he was seeing, Jas realized that the something white was one of our young, meat chickens. We rushed outside to get after the dog and check on both this chick and the others. I went to the garden side and found the chick went from drool and still, unfortunately, alive. Its poor neck injured from dog teeth. As I walked to Jason grasping the chick close to me (wrapped in a bag) he was just closing up the door to the chick pen. We knew what had to be done. Jas came back momentarily with his knife. We were left stunned that our pup who has always been a protector of the chickens, who has never tried to harm any of them, would now have essentially killed one. Loss of life happens. Whether its by a predator or by you or sometimes in an unexpected way such as this. A new plan had to be made and the next morning a chicken tractor was built so that the chicks could be out and protected, It was the plan all along but we had figured them being out near the pen for a couple days when we were home and mostly outside was okay to will got the tractor built. Hank moved up this task to priority level. Even with the best plans, in this lifestyle especially, your priorities can change instantaneously. You never want to lose a life, these lives are precious to us and their loss is hard. We take responsibility of these creatures and when we fail, even to one we feel it.

Here is where my faith begins in my unique way,. I suffer from anxiety. I handle it fine most days and have learned ways to personally cope with flare ups. However, when something like this comes up it triggers an alarm in my head…..now its not just Hank that may be out for my chickens, but every known predator known to chickens is after them. It literally fees like that. Unfortunately, the night of this event, Jas had to go out of town, which is another trigger for me. So as night time approacched, my mind would not rest from worry over those chickens. If I was not thinking about them and wondering what else I could’ve, should’ve done before now to keep them safe, I was outside with my flashlight, scanning for predators, counting their little heads. I know it sounds obsessive and it is. My anxierty makes me obsess. So I came inside after hours of this back and forth, teary eyed. I went to my bed and put my phone down and turned on my lamp and without thought, hit my knees. I pray for my home, my husband, my children, our garden, our animals daily, but that night, I prayed another known prayer to He and I…..one that my faith could conquer my fear, That my faith and His power, could calm the fear in my head, could turn off the voices of worry, could protect my animals, and could bring His comfort to my heart.

See although, faith is needed for the garden to grow, the rain to come, the animals to grow, the children to grow, MY faith, my faith needs to also bring me peace on the homestead.  My faith needs to be the strongest tool I have because I’m not like the other wondrous beings on my little homestead, I have something that makes me different. I know that bad things will still happen, but so will the good, and the good more often than the bad, that’s why I choose to live this everyday! I am stronger than my fear, than my anxiety, I am stronger because there is faith on the farm, my faith.

 

Megan